It's a Squirrely Conspiracy

Squirrels are eating my trashcans. This does not seem like good squirrel nutrition to me. I thought they liked acorns and nuts. But Rubbermaid? I know they are really after the tasty goodness burried inside the can--leftover meatloaf, corn, and the occassional moldy bread. But if this were really the case and they were only burrowing THROUGH the lid to get to the garbage then wouldn't I see bits of trashcan all over? I don't. So I can only conclude that the rodents are consuming the plastic. Which by the way, brings up another question, why do they call it Rubbermaid when it is clearly NOT rubber? And what's with the spelling of MAID. I find it an insult. But I digress. Back to the squirrels. I like them, I really do enjoy watching their funny squirrely antics and behavior. I even feed them. I toss old apples and half-eaten corn cobs, bad plums out there. You'd think they would be happy with that and leave my trashcans alone. I believe it is a conspiracy between the squirrels and Rubbermaid. Backyard critter consumption of trash cans is, after all, the number one reason to replace your cans. Think about it. How often would you purchase new trashcans if not for the holes being chewed into them. Uhm, not too often. It gets embarrassing after a while to see your cans lined up on trashday at the curb with holey lids and occassionally leaking, chewed-through bottoms. So, you are forced to buy new knowing that in a just a few short weeks the squirrels will have chewed them to bits. Why, why do we do this? Why don't we fight back? Metal cans, you say. No, I have made a study of this and for some reason the metal cans attract larger rodents--raccoons and Possums--yes we have possums in PA. They not only lift the lids, crawl inside but make a mess. It's a no win situation. We are nothing more than a grocery store to the backyard critters. If you throw it out, they will come. Not matter what receptacle you use. It's part of the cycle of life, I suppose. The farmer grows the food, the store sells it to us, we cook it and eat half of it, toss the other half into a bag, toss bag into can, squirrels smell it, they eat through the lid, feast on leftovers, we buy new cans and it starts all over again.
You can't win. I've accpeted this.

1 comment:

Bonnie Calhoun said...

LOL...PA must have some truly strange squirrels!