You Might Be a Writer If --
Okay, I know many others have done this but I thought I'd take a stab at it.
You might be a writer if:
You ever asked the question, "Who ate the first lobster?" I mean who looked at that creepy, monster-like crustacean and said, "Um that would be good with a little drawn butter?"
Your child is undergoing a spinal tap and instead of holding her hand you're taking notes.
You have already given birth twice but decide to do it again for research purposes and this time without drugs so you can get the full, unclouded effect.
You seriously worry what might happen if the FBI got a hold of your computer and saw what you've been googling.
You force your family to spend their vacation at Colonial Williamsburg, yet again! Because this time you're going to ask the tour guide if you can actually try churning butter—just to get the real feel.
You are chin deep in chapter six when the phone rings. It's your mother. She asks, "What are you doing?" And you say, "Nothing much, just . . . dusting."
You wake up in the middle of the night because the characters in your head have decided to have a party and they didn't invite you, so you jump out of bed to at least listen and write it all down.
You won't admit this to anyone but going to a writers conference is better than Christmas and your birthday combined and you pray seriously that none of your children will get sick until AFTER you are on the airplane and you only feel mildly guilty for doing this.
Some of your best friends are police officers, paramedics, psychiatrists, librarians, cave experts, neurosurgeons, ballistics experts, botanists, and you are on a first name basis with the poison control lady.
You have seriously contemplated tossing your computer out the window.
Now it's your turn. Any to add?